I find that some of the hardest questions in life are the "how" and the "why". For instance, one's identity is one of THE MOST common questions to be asked: "who am I?" I find that's a pretty difficult question indeed but the harder question is HOW do I find out who I am? If there was an answer to the how, then identity wouldn't be so hard to find. If you think about it, the world no longer wants to solely so amazing results; they want to see how you got these amazing results. Then there's the why... we tend to ask that A LOT (well, I do). I believe there's a reason behind everything so I tend to ask why a lot. In fact, someone's told me that there isn't always a why and that I read too much into things.... really now? hmm... I still ask but I try not to read too much into things now.
So one day I was watching Glades and one line really got to me: "I would never put a question mark where God put a period." I catch myself asking God "why me" or "why is this (not) happening" or "why am I here"... just a lot of why's! If God put you somewhere, He also put a period there. It's not "I am here?" but "I am here." We're so ineffictive and unsatisfied when we keep questioning things that cannot be changed. I'm curious about those things too but we should focus our curiousity on things that we CAN change, the how's. I'm not sure why I can rant so long about questions... moving on.
Recently, I shopped at Faith Family Bookstore (Christian bookstore). I bought two books: "quiet reflections of Peace" and "quiet reflections of Hope". When I saw them, I expected a few more titles with the similar cover... I duno like maybe love, joy, faith or something but there wasn't. When I looked closer, they said "120 Devotions to Start/End Your Day". It's pretty obvious which one's to start and which one's to end. Do you awaken with a sense of hope every morning? Do you fall asleep with a sense of peace every night? I would consider that the ideal life but in realiy I definitely don't feel that EVERY DAY or NIGHT but it is what God wants for us. He doesn't want us to wake up every morning and our first thought is "sigh, another day of ______" (maybe even a few swear words in there). God also doesn't want us to be wide awake in the early hours of the next morning because there are too many thoughts and worries and ________. This isn't the life that He intended us to have and yet this is what we're going through. I'm sure we've all "been there, done that". If you look at the time I post this... I'm there right now. I apologize for not posting anything lately, been kinda busy and frustrated. I feel like I can't be full-disclosure on this blog anymore because I know there are people reading it... but I am still very genuine in what I post.
Oh yeah, as an update... Free the Children at UTSC is getting started, OHHH YEAHHHHH! I'm in the process of hiring my executive team for the coming year, got through all the applicants and scheduled interviews (long two days next week). Thankfully, I have a good new friend/newest executive member through all this. I'm not exactly the organized type so she's a real big help haha this isn't part of her job description. I have final exams soon then SASKATCHEWAN! :] I'm looking forward to it, well the latter part.
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